How to Start Over: 3 Simple Steps for Intentional Slow Living
As a little girl, I used to imagine that my life would be full of glamour. I’d see my name lit up on the marquee, I’d win awards, and I would be celebrated for my talents.
My biggest dream, a central pillar of that fantasy, was to be praised for my fashion by none other than Joan Rivers. A woman whom I not only admired but strived to emulate: loud, sardonic, full of sass, and unwilling to be pushed down.
But as I got older, much changed, and none of it was what I imagined.
And that hurt.
My name is not in lights on the marquee. I am not working with seasoned actors or walking past my picture on covers of magazines at the check stands.
Instead, I’ve created a profoundly different life for myself—one that isn’t so stressful or focused on clinging to something fleeting. It is a life rooted in the authenticity of the countryside, the warmth of the home, and the deep satisfaction of simplicity.
The change I made was a fresh start, and it was one I didn’t know I would have to make over and over again.
Starting over doesn’t always have to be a painful break; it can be a beautiful, fresh way of looking at something. But sometimes, it feels heavy, too. This most recent transition felt lethargic, making me question every step. So, what do you do when the starting line feels less like a dash and more like a gentle, reluctant push?
That’s where the actual work begins.
Three Simple Steps to Reclaim Your Starting Line
When that heavy feeling sets in and you realize it’s time to build a new chapter, you don’t need a grand plan—you just need three simple anchors to ground you. These are the practical steps I use to move forward, embracing the beautiful simplicity of the rustic life I’ve built.
1. Define the Feeling, Not the Title
Instead of defining success by a title or an award (like that marquee light), focus on what you want your life to look and feel like. Do you want to feel peaceful? Grounded? Creative? Write down 3–5 feeling words. This authentic internal compass is far more valuable than any external metric.
2. Set One Intentional Goal (100% Focus)
When you have a new goal—whether it’s painting a room or launching a project—you need to focus 100% on that one step. Trying to multitask a fresh start leads to exhaustion and distraction. Choose a single, manageable goal and dedicate your full, intentional energy to it. Your energy is finite; spend it purposefully. Otherwise, that goal will never come to fruition.
3. Give Yourself Grace
This is the most critical step, and one the French embrace in their slow living: patience and kindness. Allow for mistakes and growing pains. Change is hard, especially when it involves letting go of old dreams. Treat yourself the way you would treat a dear friend embarking on a difficult journey. Know that this transition is demanding, but the light at the end of the tunnel—a life built on your own authentic terms—is absolutely worth it.
The Most Important Relationship
Ultimately, being in a relationship with yourself is the most important one you’ll ever have. Being happy with the way your life is, and how you choose to live it, is absolutely a challenge. But at the end of the day, if you’re not happy, you have the power to change it. Regardless of the cost, changing the direction of your life is how you make the best of any situation.
Until Next Time
Christina
